Wedding Bell Blues - [45]

Lily had been planning on cooking dinner for Ben and Ken tonight, and so she had invited Jack tojoin them. She was making ratatouille with fresh vegetables Granny McGilly had brought them from hergarden. A one-dish meal could always be stretched to feed one more person.

The only creature in the household who seemed to object to Jack’s presence was Mordecai. Whenhe saw his veterinarian walk in the door, he had slunk down the hall and hidden under Mimi’s crib. Jackhad lured him out with Milk-Bones and assurances that she was not there in an official capacity.

Ben and Ken were cuddling on the couch. Lily had never seen her “husband” so happy. For aslong as she’d known him, Ben had a cynical streak that was equally likely to express itself in dark humoror sulkiness. Since Ken had arrived on the scene, Ben’s sulkiness had disappeared entirely.

Lily, Jack, Ben, and Ken sat companionably around the dinner table. For a moment it remindedLily of her and Ben’s old days with Dez and Charlotte, except that Ken lacked Dez’s flamboyance, andJack ... Jack was not Charlotte.

After dinner, Ben announced that he and Ken were going back to Ken’s place for dessert.

Lily grinned as she cleared the dinner dishes. “I bet I know what’s on the dessert menu.”

Jack laughed. “Not been married half a year, Lily, and he’s already stepping out on you.”

Ben’s face reddened, but he was laughing.

“You just be sure not to fall asleep over there,” Lily warned. “You need to be spending the night athome, like a dutiful husband.”

“Don’t worry. I won’t neglect my husbandly duties.”

With Ben and Ken gone and Mimi tucked into bed, Lily and Jack sat together on the couch, coffeein hand.

“Mimi’s a sweet little thing.” Jack paused to sip her coffee. “Fun to play with.”

“Well, thanks for wearing her down. She went out as soon as her head hit the pillow.”

“I like kids. I reckon if I hadn’t been a vet, I woulda been a pediatrician. Of course, I wanted kidsto like me, and no kid ever likes going to the doctor.”

Lily sipped her coffee. “Did you ever think about having kids of your own?”

Jack grinned. “I thought about it before. I could actually picture myself changing diapers andheating bottles, but there was no way in hell I could picture myself pregnant.”

Lily laughed. “A pregnant butch is a sight to behold. You should’ve seen Charlotte. Once shestarted to show, she went to Kmart and bought a bunch of oversized T-shirts and drawstring sweatpants.

She said there was no way in hell she was putting on a maternity dress.”

“I don’t blame her. So how come she was the one that ended up carrying the baby?”

“We determined it very scientifically. We drew names out of a hat. So I could just as easily havebeen Mimi’s biological mother instead of Charlotte, and Ben could have been Mimi’s biological dadinstead of Dez.”

“Have you ever thought how much easier your life would be now if things had turned out thatway?”

“Many times. Of course, if Ben and I had been the parents, we would’ve had a different little girlthan the one we have. And I wouldn’t trade Mimi for anything.” Lily set down her coffee cup. “God, thecloser the hearing gets, the more nervous I get. I’m afraid to say I’ll be glad when it’s over, though,because I’ll only be glad if everything turns out okay.”

“I know.” Jack took Lily’s hand in hers.

Lily’s first instinct was to pull away, but the strength in Jack’s big, gentle hand was comforting.

“I also feel bad about lying all the time,” Lily said. “I’ve never been so dishonest before. I spendso much of my time just hoping I’m doing the right thing.”

Jack looked down at Lily’s hand in hers. “I’ll tell you what, Lily. It’s wrong that anybody wouldtry to take Mimi away from you. It’s so wrong, that anything you do to get to keep her is the right thing.”

“Thank you for saying that. I’ve wondered what you think of me for doing this. You’re a goodfriend, Jack. I’m glad I met you.”

“I’m glad I met you, too.” Jack was silent for a moment, looking down at Lily’s hand. “It’s beenreal lonely around the house with Daddy gone, and the past few years I’ve ended up being the bachelorfriend to all my friends in couples, and then —” She cut herself off. “I’m sorry I’m doing a bad job ofsaying this.”

Lily pulled her hand away. “Of saying what?”

Jack half grinned. “See? I told you I was doing a bad job.” She looked down, and her voicebecame serious again. “I guess what I’m trying to say is...oh, hell.” Jack looked up at Lily and reached outto plush Lily’s hair out of her face. Lily watched passively as Jack leaned toward her and softly touchedher lips to hers. Lily was paralyzed.

As soon as Jack pulled away, Lily scooted to the opposite end of the couch. She hadn’t felt anotherwoman’s lips on hers since Charlotte’s, and the feel of Jack’s lips made her ache for Charlotte’s kisses.

But there was something else, too. “Jack, I’m not ready...”

“I know. I ought not to have done that. It was just that I couldn’t make the words come out right,and I’ve always been better at doing things than saying them. I know you’re not ready yet, Lily. You’re a