Темное, кривое зеркало. Том 5: Средь звезд, подобно гигантам - [16]

How could he tell Lyndisty's father that she was dead?

"I heard you," he said. "She is fine. A beautiful young woman."

"Is she married yet?"

"No, but there are several candidates. I think she enjoys the attention. She has…. a way of looking at the young men, a way of moving her eyes that draws them all in. She got that from your sister. Exactly the same tilt of the head."

"And Drusilla?"

Another pause, as Marrago thought of something to say. Drusilla had become selfish and spoiled and shrewish. The two of them spent as little time together as they could. She played the Game of Houses and took young lovers to her bed and enjoyed intrigues and gossip.

But he remembered a time when he had danced with her at Barrystan's wedding, and watched her eyes sparkle with love for his friend, her new husband. He remembered as the light in her eyes died when he told her of his death. He had married her for honour, and she him for protection. There had never been love there. Her capacity for love had died when he had.

"She is well," he said simply.

"You did it, then?" Barrystan said. "Thank you, Jorah. Many would not have…. Thank you." Marrago did not say anything. There was very little to say. He had come here hoping, praying, for a chance to talk with Lyndisty one last time, to tell her he loved her one last time, to tell her that she had been the light illuminating his world.

He had never expected that he would have to tell the truth to one of his oldest friends twenty-five years after he had died.

"I cannot believe how old you look," Barrystan said again.

"I am old. I have been old for a very long time."

"Still playing at war? Are you Lord-General now?"

"I was. I…. serve the Republic in another way now. One better suited to my talents."

"What fool of an Emperor let you go from being Lord-General? Who is Emperor now, anyway? Turhan cannot still be alive?"

"He's been dead for a while. No…. a…. you won't believe this. Londo Mollari. Emperor Mollari II."

"Mollari? Never! Well…. he got it after all. The thing he wanted most in all the world."

"The thing he wanted most as a young man. I think now he only sits on that throne because there is no one else. Age…. is an…. uncomfortable thing, Barrystan. I am not sure if I would not have preferred to have died like you, a young man, still with all my hopes and aspirations and dreams."

"You saw my daughter grow up. You made love to my wife while my ashes were floating in the night winds. You could breathe clean air. You could drink warm brivare and eat fine foods. You are alive, Jorah. Death is a cold place, sometimes. Enjoy life while you have it."

What could he say? That he had watched Lyndisty die, that he had seen Drusilla shun his every gentle touch, that he had breathed air filled with the ashes of his people, that he had tasted only blood and bones?

Life was a cold place sometimes as well.

"Did we ever listen when we were young men, Barrystan? Some things do not change with age."

"No, I suppose they don't. Well, Jorah. Since you've awoken me from whatever it was I was doing, at least try to listen to me. You aren't that old, and whatever has happened to you, you are still alive, and it can always be made better. There is no going back when you are dead. There is nothing."

"Really?" Marrago whispered. He did not want to believe that. He did not want to believe Lyndisty had an eternity of nothing stretched out before her. "There must be something? Heaven, Hell? The infinite pleasure palaces of Emperor Creoso?"

"Whatever there is, I have not found it. You are alive, Jorah. So live!"

"Which of us is older now, friend?" he said.

"You, by at least three years, but that does not mean wisdom, does it?"

"Probably not."

"Be sure to tell Lyndisty I love her. I wish I could have seen her one last time. And Drusilla. I never loved anyone as much as I loved her."

"I will tell them," Marrago breathed, trying to hold back the tears filling his eyes.

"And remember." The voice seemed to be coming from a very long way away. "You're alive, Jorah. Don't ever forget that."

"I won't.

"I won't."

* * *

The Centauri were one of the oldest of the younger races, and certainly one of the proudest. The Shadow War had seen their ancient civilisation totter and almost fall, but a combination of luck, outside assistance and the dedicated leadership of Emperor Mollari II ensured its safety.

But as the Centauri were soon to learn, victory sometimes costs more than defeat. The enforced treaty by which the Republic joined the Alliance would soon cripple them. The cost of building Babylon 5 hit them no harder than it did many others, but the extent of military aid demanded for the Alliance fleet meant leaving many worlds undefended, a fact of which numerous raiders were more than willing to take advantage.

The Republic was also to bear the brunt of the feared Inquisitors, dispatched by the Vorlons to seek out any who had aided the Shadows during the war. Before this period the Inquisitors had been no more than legend. The first confirmed sighting was in 2259, with the testing of Delenn and John Sheridan, the second in 2262, when Satai Kats was interrogated by the most feared of them all, the human known as Sebastian.